Family life tends to be dominated by the medical problems of the sick child. The emotional needs of other children may be neglected--not to mention those of the parents!  The sick child's emotional life and development also suffers.

    Grandparents and other relatives, and also neighbors and family friends, can be enormous helps but they can also make a lot of trouble if they do not understand the illness. Vigorous educational efforts are justified.

    Serious marital problems may develop if the two parents see the illness diffferently--whether about its nature (psychological or physical) and its treatment.  I recommend family counseling when this occurs.

    Serious problems also are frequent when parents are separated or divorced.  The non-custodial parent often disagrees about the nature of the illness or how to treat it.  This is very upsetting to the sick child and may permanently damage her relationship with the non-custodial parent.  In addition, arguments about the nature or treatment of the illness do sometimes end up in court.  In one case I know of personally the father's accusation of Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome caused the divorce judge (without any medical evidence) to deprive the mother of the right to take her child to the doctor of her choice.

    On the brighter side, adolescents with CFS or related syndromes, even those who are very ill for a long time, do seem to have a normal, healthy psychosocial development.  This statement is based upon my personal observation of a number of such young people.  There are no studies confirming this with young people who have CFS, but research with adolescents who have other kinds of physical disability comes to the same conclusion.

    The normal psychosocial development of adolescents with CFS is somewhat surprising, given the very limited social lives so many of them have.  Parents should of course make every effort to enhance their sick kid's social life.  One way to do this is via a laptop computer with an internet connection.  The internet connection allows not only email but also chat with other teens, while the laptop allows use of the computer in bed or on a couch.  Useful internet connections for young people are found at the CFIDS Association of America Youth Home Page.

    Of special interest are essays by siblings and parents for YPWC, and the Pen Pal Connection.

    There is a lot more to be said about this topic.  Please send me suggestions or comments.